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I now reside in Birmingham, Alabama, with my girlfriend, Elise. On the stud spectrum I call myself a stud because when I came out that was the only term around to describe a dominant lesbian wnother color.

My preference would be call girls in istanbul date someone who is dominant but also feminine. It really turns me off that giving it another shot studs only I dated femmes I was the unable to express myself as a woman. A lot of femmes not all think that because you dress like a man and have masculine ways, that that means you want to be a man.

I had to giving it another shot studs only hard core and pretend to be unemotional all the while I was actually dying inside. The pressure to be hard core and gangsta was just too overwhelming. I first realized I like studs when I first came out about 15 years ago my very first girl was a stud.

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I was 14 at the time and I thought because she was a girl and I was a girl and we both liked girls, that that meant we could be. A stud dated a femme. To date another stud was nasty. I took her words to heart, and buried my attraction to studs deep down and continued doing what was deemed right in speed dating swansea lesbian community. I felt giving it another shot studs only.

I fought the hell out of it. I met my girlfriend, Elise, in a stud for stud group on Facebook.

Considering how taboo it is, I feel like that was the only zhot, non judgemental zones for us. The one thing I love and admire about Elise is the fact that she stands by everything she says and does. She is steadfast in her beliefs, and I really admire that about.

Protective but subtle about it. She is so hard working, almost to the point of being a workaholic.

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The same things I found attractive in a femme, are the studds things I find attractive about a stud. Her cologne, the softness of her body, her ability to submit as well as giving it another shot studs only in every aspect of our relationship. It is very difficult because a lot of studs see S4S as nasty, women want nsa Wellston and weird.

The thought of dating another stud is met with qnother and disbelief. Like who strapping spot the difference girls I think we have become programmed to think a stud should be with a femme and vice versa.

There is the possibility that while in public a stud and a anoyher could be mistaken for boyfriend and girlfriend. There is a chance that femme-stud couples could pass for normal, non threatening and not to draw undue attention. I think the black lesbian community is afraid of the scrutiny that would come from giving it another shot studs only heterosexual community if S4S became the shoy. Elise helped me get over it honestly. My best friend gave is still giving me the hardest time over my decision to date another stud.

They were literally in a state of shock and disbelief.

Although Elise and I have a lot of work to do on ourselves as well as in our careers, I do believe this is the woman I will build a future. At the end of the day we love each other and show appreciation for one.

Why Giving Your Relationship A Second Chance Won't Change Anything | HuffPost

She loves black love and loves mangoes, cats, reading, cooking and writing about some of the challenges and joys of black lesbian relationships. We can date who we want. I blur the lines a lot. I used to be one of those judgemental people who would take a step back seeing two studs. But I realize young, love is love. What I like is not necessarily what other people like for a partner. I learned mind your business. It was the same discrimination, I received from heterosexual males being an aggressive femme.

They would say to me and my partner how about a threesome because we are femme. I was ignorant and I woke up. I hope people would wake up.

What to love is love? Congratulations to you and yours and thank you for sharing your heartfelt experience and thoughts on the subject. I wish giving it another shot studs only guys the very very best??? I love it.? Who believes this is wrong? I call her confused because regardless a female?

I jus recently came out????? Some still talk to me some still talk about me. I just do what I know best which is being. You guys are and inspiration to so many ppl. I hope nothing but the best??????? My hat goes off to s4s because these giving it another shot studs only are bold and like what they like!

Just like the rest of us. So stop with the madness people! Your either a hard stud or a soft stud and back then Wives looking for discreet relationships was label as a soft stud lol.

Boy I tell you just coming out was hard enough and then the pressure of older women telling you what to do sub swf 1830 wanted stop reading it and just respond what not to. So like I giving it another shot studs only do what makes you happy! Be blessed. I personally will only date a femme but that is because I am so attracted to it naturally.

Beautiful love story.

Keep using that courage thoughout your life. Love is Love at the end of the day. You definitely have to live your life the way you want and with who you want to live it with at the end of the end of the day!

I love the fact that you do, what makes you happy. I thinks so many times ojly try and live up to labels that man seaking woman given to us, whether they be right or wrong for us. A woman is a woman, is a woman.

Society needs to stop with the covers and read the book. Congratulations on being you and doing what makes you happy!

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I personally love S4S relationships. I wish you the best in your relationship. Best wishes to you.

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Life is too short for BS. Love who you love! I love this article getting laid ft Bozeman Montana it truly is about who you love and not what they have to look like according to the ridiculous standards of the society we live in. I am all about no roles because anotger limits your ability to fully express yourself in any relationship. People of color tend to place undue pressure on their peers groups.

Love is Love. Let your friends choose their own relationship paths dtuds you choose yours. Big ups to you. You love who you giving it another shot studs only no matter what giving it another shot studs only else has to say. Good luck to you both and God bless. Love is love. It still amazes me how the oppressed continue to support the limiting views of the oppressors! Wake up Sisterhood try building your sista up instead of trying to tear her down!

My masculine of center wife pen name Sharon S. Within the black lesbian community, we have a history of discrimination against S4S and F4F partners. Her books explored that topic after interviewing studs who dated other studs. Certainly a worthwhile givinv and subject that deserves more discussion.

Love who you want to love we are all human first and capable of loving another human no matter race or sexual preference. Your email address will not be published. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.